Focus

I was on hold the other day waiting to make an appointment and as I was flipping through the calendar I noticed a word that kept coming up over and over again. I learned about key words in my inductive bible study a few years back and I know from experience to stop and take notice of words that repeat.  As I looked over the next few months I saw these important notes on my calendar: last doctor appointment, last dentist appointment, last day of school, last day of gymnastics, last gymnastics camp, last Mops meeting, last day at church, last day as youth director, last VBS, last bible study, last day at work, last day in Augusta, last day in the US. There it was, a very important word for me right now, last. My heart began to sink as I sat on hold seeing all the “last” things that were creeping up. Some were harder to swallow then others, some of these things have been in my life for the last 6 years and have been my support system through a lot of joy and heart ache. As the word threatened to throw me into a pit of darkness a still small voice said one simple sentence that brought me back to reality “focus on the firsts”. For me, right now, those are harder to see because there is no set date nor guarantee for many of the firsts God is calling me to focus on. Yes I have a date for the 1^st day in South Africa but past that all the things I am to focus on require faith. I am looking to a day in the future where I will see our 1^st student walk through the doors, the 1^st child to accept Christ, 1^st family to be transformed, 1^st student to excel in their studies, 1^st to graduate from high school, 1^st thank you, 1^st full stomach, 1^st outreach team to come spend time with these kids, 1^st south African national to join our team, 1^st gang member to change their life.

These are what I am to focus on. Not all the things that I am giving up, or the people I am leaving. But the amazing things God is going to do through us. The lives that will be changed forever.

It’s been an interesting week, seeing what changing my focus from last to first can do. Moving my mindset from being self-focused back to being God-focused. I think we can do this in any area of our lives. Instead of focusing on the things we have lost, or the trials and struggles focus on God and what He has for us. I wonder if we took ourselves out of the equation and truly made God the center of our lives how differently we would live. Not just on Sunday mornings or with what we say but to truly look inside our hearts and seek out the areas where we are selfish and ask God for His agenda, His perspective and learn to walk it out. I have been guilty of this lately, I have allowed myself to focus on the things I will miss, the things I am giving up. While it hasn’t changed my mind about going it has changed my mindset and my ability to trust God with all the details. This week as I shift my focus I am once again seeing how He is working out the details. It doesn’t mean moving to Africa is an easy walk in the park but it gives me the faith to keep walking forward even when I can’t see the path before me. The truth is, as much as I sometimes think otherwise, my life isn’t really about me. There is so much more to this life then what I want, what I think I need.

So now I will once again focus on God, on all the 1^st that are to come and the 2nds and 3rds to follow. I am shifting my mindset away from being all about me and remembering it’s really all about Him. I am walking in His shadow and striving to show Jesus’s love in everything I do.  I will keep moving forward in faith even when the path is hard and I can’t see what’s in front of me. Because at the end of the day, when everything is said and done I’d rather be walking a hard path with God then following an easy road without Him. 

Missions: What it is and what it isn't

We have had some questions as to what exactly we will and will not be doing in South Africa and I wanted to take a few minutes and address it here in case anyone else is wondering. I hope that the new addition to the website in the next few weeks will help with questions too, Eddie and I are working on writing out what life was like for him growing up in South Africa during the Apartheid and even the years after.  Sometimes even I forget that Eddie has a very different past then I do and take for granted how far away from the struggles he has come. I am hoping hearing his heart for his people group will help you understand why we are moving to South Africa and why we are so passionate about what we will be doing.  Now to clear a few things up:

We do not believe manipulating people in any way shape or form to believe what we believe is healthy or in any way the message of Jesus. We will be accepting students from any religious background into our program and will NOT be requiring them to agree with us or believe what we say is truth.  Any child living in the township where we will be working in is free to come and utilize all programs we offer including food and help with education.  It breaks my heart to even think that people might believe there are conditions on entering our programs.  Never in my life in all my missions travel have I ever required anyone to say or believe what I believe in order to get help.

All that being said, I do believe Jesus is truth and that the gospel message can and does change lives. We will be sharing the gospel message in the ways we choose to live, in our friendships and our family. We will live out the message of love and hope. We will be Gods hands and feet, feet by going where we are called and hands by serving others.  Yes we will have bible studies and we will share our faith and honestly I would love for every child we work with and every family they represent to know God and to know the love, peace and hope that comes from Him. However it is not my job or responsibility to convince anyone that God is God, it is my job to be obedient and share His love.  Their relationship is between them and the Holy Spirit, I have no power to save anyone. There is no benefit in requiring anyone to accept Christ, again our job is to be obedient in what He has called us to do.  To go and help these kids find hope in their future.

This can be a tricky subject and I hope that you can hear my heart in all of this. I am a Christian and I am not ashamed of that. I would not be moving to Africa if God had not called me to and I will openly and honestly share my faith with whomever wants to hear it. I do respect that everyone has a choice and I also know that a surface faith (like only saying you accept Christ so I would help you) is not really faith and is of no value in the long run. Its the love, peace, joy and hope that Christ has brought Eddie and I that we freely give to those we will be serving. We are going to be an example of Christ, not to judge or require anything but to help bring hope into a very hopeless situation. To be a light where is a darkness and to offer help that can bring change. Please feel free to contact us with any questions.

Belize 2012